While You Were Sleeping

Your day has come to an end.  The kids are in bed and you are left with just enough energy to fall into your bed and get a good night’s rest.  This is the time when you are able to turn off everything and just relax into your own dreamland, right?  Unfortunately, as great as this idea is, it is not reality for some.   

At least for me this is when I become “Meg the security guard making sure my son sleeps safely throughout the night.”  Sounds heroic right? Not true either.  Truth is that I dread night-time.  I hate sleeping in bed alone and I hate that every sound has me wondering if all is safe within my house.  If you ask my parents, they will tell you that I’ve always been somewhat paranoid about potential danger but I remember a time when my husband was the “safe” feeling that would ease me into sleep without any problems.  I will be honest that I truly miss that feeling.

Although very strong-willed, I am not a brave woman.  Within a moment’s notice I would not hesitate to save myself or my son from danger, but the fear of that danger is very real to me.  I have been truly convicted tonight in my bible reading that my fear can be construed as a lack of trust in the Lord.  I have to trust in God to keep my son and I safe from all danger and to simply rest at night so that I can be used for his glory during waking hours.

It’s a struggle I tell ya!  Even now as I write this, I took a moment to check on my kiddo while he is sleeping.  “Yep, he’s still there AND he’s breathing…whew!”  All joking aside, I do believe that God knows my fear and yours if you struggle with this too.  We as women weren’t created to be the protectors, men were.  All the security systems, pepper spray, bats, locks, and dare I say it, guns will not keep your mind at ease.  They surely help, but God is the only one who can truly ease your mind and give you rest.


  1. I don't like night time either. Not that I am afraid but, I am sick of being the one who has to check out all the bumps and noises! I miss having a man in the house. My son is afraid at night and jumps at any noise. It's tiring.
    I'm thankful for my relationship with the Lord! I trust Him to help keep us safe. I want to convey that to my son so that he will trust the Lord and not be so fearful.
    Thanks for your honest posting. God bless you.

  2. I would agree with both of you. I miss having my husband at home, for more reasons than the noises & the comfort of being protected. I do feel safe in my home, have some fear of burglars, fire, etc. Its my children who have more of those fears. At bedtime prayers they always add pray we don't get robbed or have a fire. I wonder is it because dad isn't in our home? Do they have those fears at dads house? I also pray that God would get a hold of dad, change his heart to live for The Lord, and restore our marriage even after divorce. I know this is the heart of my children, & a desire that only God could give me after so much pain & I believe Gods heart also.